Frugal Friday: A Family Closet

Today's post is about laundry room organization. I often tell people I was born organizing. As a young child all though my teen years my business-woman mom would hire me and my younger brother to help her organize her sewing shop. I STILL love organizing!!

Now life with 5 kids seems to be completely contrary to organization. The two always seem to be at war with each other. However, large families and organization do not have to be mutually exclusive. There can be a mingling of sorts. Sometimes we're crazy organized and sometimes we just go with the flow. How else would I keep my sanity?

Well as soon as we toured the house that eventually became our home, I saw the potential. Family Closet!! I was in love!

If you've never heard of a Family Closet you look up the Duggars and come back. Seriously it's all the rage with large families. Shoot it's been around since one room cabins in the prairie. Basically it means keeping everyone's clothes, etc in one location in the house- the laundry area/room more times than not.

The simplicity of it is amazing.

First off we had this HUGE upstairs laundry room.... Now I get it- MOST people don't have giant rooms for laundry. We sure didn't till we moved here. BUT with a lot of creativity most homes can have a family closet. Even if a family closet isn't really suitable for your home, the more compact and organized your space, the more time and energy and even money you save in the long run.


So- without further ado- here is our family closet!

Since we knew we would not be moving for a long time if ever again we invested in steel commercial clothing racks to last the ages. When all else fails they work great for gymnastics (insert eye-roll). Honestly the commercial racks were only a tiny bit more in price than the cheapo plastic ones from the big-name store so hey win-win.

On the dyer side we have a rolling rack for easy movement but so far it gets very little use. The washer and dryer are getting up there in age. Someday when we're rich we hope to get 2 sets of stackable washer/dryers and have a mini-laundrymat. With 8 people in the family we could use 2 of each!

Off to the side we have 3 dressers for 7 of us to share (mother-in-law has her own clothes downstairs). We also keep plastic totes for off-season clothes and clothes for the kids to grow into. However rule #1- ONLY keep what you truly will use. If you find you just are not loving that skirt from last season- GIVE IT AWAY!. Too many kids clothes- DOWNSIZE AND DECLUTTER!

Each season I am strict when we pack up leftovers. Do I know this will be worn again? Does it have ANY holes at all (automatic toss)? Stains? Do we, me, kids love it? If not- it's out the door! We are lucky enough that we get blessed with hand-me-downs through out the year and I rarely have to buy clothes. When I do I usually do thrift stores so our clothes have little sentimental value. I like it that way- easier to let it go when it's holey, stained, and no longer being use.

Now a lot of times people will ask that golden question- How many pairs of clothes for each kid?

Honestly this is an answer only you can figure out. Is your child super messy? Older or younger? How often do you change clothes?

For my baby (16 month old) and the 3 yr old we have about 14 outfits (2 per day for a week). For my older girls who are less messy about 8-10 outfits. For my son who has sensory issues and is very very very picky about clothes- about 7 outfits. Me and hubby- I don't count but it's not more than 15 each. His are split between business and casual and mine are whatever skirt/shirt I fancy at the moment.

Shoes are the same way. We keep only what we actively use. I'm not a purse fan so I have 2 that I rotate out. I don't do other accessories. But if you do- just remember....

USE IT OR LOSE IT!

OR......

You end up like us before we organized!

Dining tables make BAD laundry rooms

Testimonial Tuesdays: ASL vs. Oral Debate Part 1 (Family Life)

The topic of doom. The one thing I try to avoid with a passion. The great Oral Vs. ASL debate. Why do I avoid this topic like the plague?

1. I'm in general a non-confrontational person and this topic gets my blood boiling like a volcano. It's hard to stop once I erupt.

2. The debate is never-ending. There's no cut and dry answer. Every family/individual is different and their needs/situations are different.

3. Everyone has an opinion and opinions are like onions- they usually stink and make people cry.

So why AM I talking about this topic? Well- its not because I want to make people cry. It's because it is one we face as Deaf parents or parents with Deaf/HH kids. And when you're a new parent of a deaf child, you have to come to terms with which side you plan on being on. Because sadly to say- no matter what anyone tells you- there is no middle ground.

Now I'm not saying we all have to be crazy extremist. But each parent has to make a decision at some point for your child. And it's either based on one or the other.

So what is Oral and what is ASL?

Wiki defines oralism as:
"Oralism is the education of deaf students through oral language by using lip reading, speech, and mimicking the mouth shapes and breathing patterns of speech instead of using sign language within the classroom."

ASL or manualism is defined as:
 " Manualism is a method of education of deaf students using sign language within the classroom."

Basically put oral means you learn to "listen and speak" while manualism means using a "signed language".  Simple enough right?

 But HOW is a parent to know what is best for their child? A child that often times they though was hearing until an audio exam tells them otherwise. Yet in the mist of shock, and confusion, and fear some well-meaning hearing professional tells them one specific way is the best and only correct way. Who's a parent to believe? The "professional" right??

But what about the parent? What about what is truly best for the child? These are questions that I believe NO professional should be able to answer. Only the parent and child can find the answer to this question. 

Things to consider:
1. Am I willing to learn a new language if it will benefit my child? 
        * Learning ANY language is difficult. Signed languages such as American Sign Language   (ASL) is the same.  Do not be surprised if it takes years, daily practice and application to become fluent. But while it may require time, effort, and sacrifices it can be extremely rewarding for both the parent and the child.
 
2.  If I chose Oralism, am I willing to take responsibility if my child can't learn to speak/lip-read? 
        * With Oral English- you gambling on the chance that your child will be able to lip-read and cue enough words in English to get by. No matter what the professionals tell you, your child WILL miss out. No cochlear, no hearing aid, no amount of speech therapy is going to make your child "Hearing". Some kids do well and can lip-read pretty good and speak like a "hearing" child but at the end of the day- they can't hear everything around them. The benefits are very one-sided (to the benefit of the hearing parents or hearing people around them). However with Signed Languages the risk for "failing" is basically null. Language is clear- visual. There are no hurdles to jump, no roadblocks to stumble over. Language in signs is clearly accessible to the child and the parent. ASL can be used as a springboard to teach written English language (or other written languages) since ASL is a complete language of it's own. The building blocks are put into place.

3. If I chose Signed Language, am I willing to step out of my comfort zone and meet Deaf Signing Adults?
           * When you learn any language the best approach is immersion. Hundreds of studies show this. You must submerge yourself in the language, in the culture, and even the people that use this language. ASL is no different. Adult Signing Role Models are a must. If you are not willing to take time to find and meet Deaf people, signing will not work for your family.

And yes I do recognize there are a few (FEW) children that can do fairly well as oral deaf.  Notice the key words I use in that sentence- FEW, CHILDREN, FAIRLY WELL. In some extreme situations where a the hearing parents are not willing to learn a new language, not willing to spend time with their child socializing with Deaf role models, and the child has extremely mild loss with is greatly improved with assistive listening devices such as aids or cochlears, THEN and only then would I say oral could be a valid option. Even then, I won't say that it's the best option only a valid option. Now keep in mind I am NOT talking about hearing people who lose their hearing later in life. That's a whole other ballpark! I'm strictly talking about deaf/hard of hearing children. A person who loses hearing in their teens or older life stands to benefit much more from oralism. ASL is a still a good option for the older person but oralism become a valid tool in this sphere. 

As a Hard of Hearing (Deaf cultured) adult with a Deaf husband, Deaf mother-in-law, and 3 Deaf kids it might be clear which side I'm on. I was raised main-stream oral though. I didn't learn to sign until I was in college even though I'm fluent today. Still I believe Signed Language is a Natural Language. I hope each parent of a deaf or hard of hearing child at least considers Signed Language for their child. For their child's sake.

Next time on Testimonial Tuesdays we'll look at the effect of ORAL vs. ASL debate on mainstream public schools. There are a million and one different ways oral and ASL are applied in the school setting and we will talk about the 4 major ways: inclusion, mainstreaming, segregation, and exclusion and how each effects public school learning. 

Thanks for reading and see you next time!

Speech-less Sundays: ASL song: "You Lead" by Jamie Grace

Greetings this glorious Lord's Day!

Every Sunday I want to bring to you "Speech-less Sunday".  Basically it will include a video clip with something in ASL; a song, a verse, a short story, etc. Sometimes it will be me and sometimes it will be one of our friends.

Hope you enjoy the first of many Speech-less Sundays (oh and make sure to stick around for the out-takes today!)

Frugal Friday! How to make a 110 Inch TV screen

Welcome to Frugal Friday!

Today I want to share a recent project we did about 2 weeks ago. We just moved into our new home (bought) in April and as with any new home comes the game of figuring out where furniture and whatnot will go.

Since the house we bought was about 3 times the size of our old rental, it made for very interesting configurations. Honestly having a bigger home was a TREMENDOUS blessing. We were very squashed with 8 people in less than 1400 sq ft. Now remember I tend to lean toward simplistic lifestyle and minimalism so I can hear you laughing and asking yourself- How does 8 people live in such a big house and try to be minimalist?  Well, for one thing you don't buy more furniture when you move! With 1400 sq ft of furniture in a 4,000 sq ft. house- looks pretty sparse. Which is what we are going for. In fact I think having the bigger house is easier in many ways since things have a home and it's not everything on top of each other.

Still whether you're in a big house or a small house, the whole goal is to keep only what you use and nothing more. So we are constantly decluttering and reorganizing (my love in life truly!).

One thing we realized when buying this house, was the potential for the large living room. The sheer size (900 sq ft!!!) make it the perfect place to have our church come and watch movies, etc. So our big dream moving in was a projector movie screen with surround sound.

Now choosing the perfect system for such a space isn't as easy. Darling Husband did research for 2 months while we saved up money. Finally we settled on BenQ projector, a Denon receiver, Energy surround sound system, and I got to help make the screen!!!

So without further ado- our screen building project- tutorial fashion!

First step:
Build Your Frame

Second Step:
Paint Your Frame
(I used what I had on hand which was leftover chalkboard paint. You want a nice black edge on the frame roughly 2 inches or larger all the way around)

Third Step:
Attach Your Screen
(We ordered black-out fabric from Joann's while it was on sale for only $3.50/yard... 4 yards was plenty for the 110'' screen). We attached it on the top and bottom with velcro (sewn onto fabric and sticky part onto the frame) and attached the sides by wrapping fabric around the wood frame edges and stapling. The reason we did velcro on the top and bottom is because the fabric was 54'' wide and we didn't want to loose any height on the screen so wrapping the top and bottom was out of the question. Then I had to paint the black edge on the sides where we wrapped the cloth around.

Fourth Step:
Add Mounting Brackets to Hang on Wall
(We were hanging the screen to the fireplace which is stone. We used "Hangman Picture Hanging System" 18 inches mounting brackets bought at Lowe's Home Improvement. We debated ahead of time whether to try to do a fold up screen or similar but the frame screen was just easier in the long run. We plan to keep our screen up almost all the time but with the type of hooks we bought we take it off the fireplace simply by lifting it off. Easy peasy! We used yarn tacked the the ceiling with weights on the end to mark the centerpoint.

Fifth Step:
Hang the Screen

                                                     All done!
                Now we are all ready for a fun-filled night with our church!

Testimonial Tuesday

Today was our girls' end of the semester recital for dance. And yes- our DEAF daughters take dance. The irony I know. I can see dumbfounded looks now. But, shocking as it may be, little girls will be little girls even if they are Deaf. Can you imagine the amount of twirling, butterflies, and hair-bows that abound in this home of 3 (yes THREE) girls?

As I'm sitting and enjoying the show, I'm overwhelmed at the sacrifice our teacher has made to allow our girls to take dance this year. First of all, it took us over a year to find a teacher willing to work with Deaf students, able to communicate and understand their needs. We were VERY blessed to find a Deaf teacher of all things with a dance degree. And she volunteers her time completely for free. It truly was God's leading. 

Deaf teacher leading Katie and Ani in the recital

Ani strutting her stuff

Devotional time during dance

Mrs. Tamara our amazing Deaf dance teacher

Now however-  my middle daughter is very different personality. She much more rough and tumble. She tried ballet/tap for 2 months and declared it "awful". She wants gymnastics instead. But being Deaf doesn't allow that kind of flexibility. Every change is wrought with obstacles. I mean it took a year... a YEAR... to find a Deaf teacher to teach dance. And that was purely God leading. Now I'm charged as her mother with the struggle of finding a gymnastics place that either is willing to let us bring an interpreter (which slows down the class) or find a Deaf person who does gymnastics. I'd even accept a class that is willing to be small and the teacher willing to gesture if it means she gets to take gymnastics.

Ayrianna the monkey hanging on dad

 5 different gymnastic places were called. The answer- No we can't do any of those things.

Not ONE place willing to host for a Deaf child. Not one.

We live in an inaccessible world. There is always a lack of (qualified or otherwise) interpreters, lack of communication, lack of  inclusion, and worst of all lack of empathy.

Every day as a parent, it seems we fight for our Deaf kids rights. In the public school system or trying to get them into extracurricular activities, homeschool co-ops or camps. Who will interpret? Who will make sure your Deaf child is included? It seems almost like a never-ending struggle.

But we'll keep trying. Keep hoping, keep praying. Maybe someday access will be equal. It's a long fight. It's slow and often times painful. But it's one we MUST fight. For our children, for our friends. For future Deaf.

And I know most of all God will lead us. Until then, we take what we are given and find joy in the everyday trumphs.

Because today-                                          

The Good, the Bad, and the Horribly Ugly

Strange that one of my first posts would be about something so horribly human. Unfortunately that's what I am. Human. If you're looking for a blog that only is happy go-lucky all the time, keep pushing the "next blog" button.

Today we're going to talk about kids and Fish. Specifically little kids and the unending troubles I seem to have with keeping fish alive.

About a year ago my best friend moved far far away. We got the left-behinds including (1) 10 gallon fish tank. My first ever.

After a while, the fish became my dearest friends. I love the fish. No... I LOVE the fish. It's almost sad to be so attached to an animal...errr....fish.

After months and months of keeping a stable tank, we experienced a few fish deaths which lead to the biggest probelm of all. We bought new fish. HOWEVER I knew nothing about acclimating periods, ammonia, nitrates, and nitrites, etc. About a week and half after the new fish came home, about 5 fish died all in one day. I was stumped! What could possibly be wrong? So hello internet searches- my knowledge depth in fish went from mild to medium deep very quickly. Another week in, numerous water changes, hours and hours of work, plus about $120 later, I have a completely functional hosptial tank, about 5 different chemicals and meds for fish, frogs, and snails, and a million testers. In the process, lost about 4 more fish. I'm down to 1 African dwarf frog, 1 mystery snail, 1 dalmation molly, and 1 zip fish. BUT I was doing good. The water was cleaner than it ever had been, things were looking up....... until the toddler.

Yes- THAT toddler. The beautiful, adorable, cute toddler found the fish food. And while I'm working hard on learning web design and doing church reports, the toddler dumped EVERY.SINGLE.DROP of fish food (2 bottles) into the frog/snail hospital tank. Can you hear the crying? And I'm not talking about her. I think I shed a million tears for the frog/snail.

Which leads to more water changes, more money spend, and more hours of work. And possibly one dead snail. *cry*

Moral of the story- fish and toddlers don't mix. Oh and hide the fish food.

What's in a Name?

Welcome to Deaf-Fining Life blog! While contemplating what to name this blog, I knew I had to do a play on words. Since I knew that my main focus would be Deafness, a blog name had to have Deaf in the title. Also a first thought was about Deaf Homeschooling since there seems to be a void in that area of blogging. However I know if I only blog about homeschooling, I might not have much to say since honestly I'm still figuring it all out myself. But if I blog about Life from a Deaf view- well- let's just say I should never run out of things to talk about. So- without further ado... welcome to Deaf-fining Life blog. A multifaceted blog from the view of a Deaf (hard of hearing) mom, married to a Deaf husband, with 1 Hearing son, 3 Deaf daughters, and 1 son with unknown loss, and a elderly live-in Deaf mother-in-law who blesses my life. We are a reformed theology family so Christ will show in this blog often. Hope you enjoy and we're glad you came!